You know it's a bad when...

You wake up sick.  And I mean SICK.  Fever, cough, runny nose, OD on Nyquil type sick.  I walk out of my bedroom and a certain 4 year old is lying on the floor outside my door.  He only ever does that when he's sick. "oh no, Trouble #3 is sick.", say I.  "Yeah.", states Trouble 1 and 2 sitting in the family room watching TV.  "He puked".  Puked?  Oh no, "where?" I yell.  In his bed.  Ok, containment, that's good.  I strip the sheets, start the laundry, cancel therapy, rearrange my day.  Now I have to go to the market now,as opposed to after therapy.  I tell the kids to get ready for co-op and I run to the store.  Ginger ale, rice, gatorade, chicken broth, salsa.  Stuff for sickness.  Come home kids help carry in bags.  Babe is running around outside with just a diaper.  Get her inside I think as I shoo with my foot holding all my bags.  I hear glass breakage behind me. "Oh oh" says sufer gal.  Deal with it after Babe is inside.  In the kitchen Trouble #2 is screaming, yes screaming, something about she needed help, it was too heavy, yada, yada.  I see the problem.  She carried in the apple cider I had just bought as a surprise.  The gallon of apple cider.  Apparently a gallon of liquid is too heavy for her to carry and she just dropped it.  On the floor.  Too which the cheap plastic split, spilling said apple cider all over kitchen floor.  Let's refresh...I'm sicker than sick, puke upstairs, salsa on driveway, apple cider in kitchen, baby in a diaper, running late for co-op.  Awesome.  Some days you just need a do over.   Then you have a hurricane 4 days later and lose electricity for 4 days.  Sometimes the whole week need to be a do over.


Just to clarify, the glass did get picked up, salsa washed off driveway, kitchen floor got scrubbed, diaper changed, kids got to co-op, I bought new apple cider and salsa, had chicken soup for dinner, and everybody got to bed early. It was a 24 hour puke virus that was contained to one kid.  I went to the Dr..  It was a learning experience...be grateful for the little things. :)

I am a very bad blogger.

There, I got that out of the way.

 

School's back in session.  I don't know why I always say, "life is so hectic right now."   I really think that this business is just our new normal...and I'm in denial.  Gone are the days of sleeping in, going out, watching TV shows at their regularly scheduled times (thankful for DVRs, I do have a few favorites).  And I'm OK with that, most of the time. 


School is busy.  Science fairs, drama plays, costumes, field trips, Mina projects, reading, reading, reading, notebooking, math pages, how to write your last name, reading.  Then there is laundry.  Oh, the laundry.  Sometimes I just need a break, a time to sit back and just be.  Just be quiet with Jesus.  I struggle with that.  I need to intentionally be with God in quiet, more often.  Life will still be warp speed, but God's speed is so much calmer than my speed.  No matter how fast it is.

Lazy days of summer?

Surfer dude surprised me one morning with these delectable niblits. Cherries dipped in CoolWhip and sprinkled with mini choco chips.  Mmmmmmmmm.  Isn't he the sweetest?!

One cute kid.  One proud papa scorekeeper.

This picture proves that one can still be incredibly cute even though we are very sick and have really bad hair

Whoever said lazy days of summer?  That person obviously did not have children.  Nothing is lazy about summer.  Except maybe my cooking.  I tend to cook a lot less, and when I do, it's a lot simpler.  We have been so busy with Surfer dude's travel baseball team.  Tournaments almost every weekend, practice every Tuesday, and a scrimmage, or two (or three) thrown in there when ever they could.  It's been fun watching him learn how to play better baseball.  Games can be INTENSE!  Too intense sometimes for this momma.  The kids on both teams play hard.  My little boy is growing up fast.  August he turns 13.  Teenager in the house!  Our  first.  Eeeek! Behavior wise I feel sometimes as if we are turning a corner.  Then again, sometimes I don't. Mornings are still tough, but I feel as if our battles are fewer, albeit they may be a bit stronger at times.  Him pulling away from mom.  Mom trying to hold on tight.  I've been learning to loosen up my grasp.  As hard as it may be.  I have 5 years to help guide his heart.  I remember someone at one point asking me why we home schooled, and what were we going to do about a prom.  Lord, help me.  We have also been struck with the pneumonia bug.  The babe had pneumonia and double ear infections and was down and out of commission for a few days.  Almost had a trip to ala hotel CHOP.  She is a strong chickie though and amazed everyone with her quick rebound.  She is now walking.  I mean she is a walker.  No more crawling, even on grass, stones, driveway....  You name it.  Man, girlfriend gets around.  I should be thin.  I have however tried to intentionally, through all this craziness, slow down and look at and enjoy more of my children.  Tousle their hair, kiss the tiny feet, and hug all of them.  Let them get dirty.  Enjoy water play, with them.  Tell them I love them.  Tell them Jesus loves them.  Go barefoot.  Paint tiny toenails.  Eat popsicles.  Summer is almost over.  It's been a good one. :)

What was once old, is now new again

Ok, I admit I watched Mr. Rogers every day growing up, and I loved him.  Surfer Dude watched him in his early years, before the show went off air.  We loved Mr. Rogers.  We miss Mr. Rogers.  They just don't have quality TV like this anymore.  This totally rocks!   I think Mr. Rogers would like it.  We need more Mr. Rogers, less SpongeBob.

heartache overwhelming

DOB: 2007

Diagnosis: irritated intestines, gastritis, epilepsy

Gemma was raised by her birth mother until she was 2 years old. At that time, she was placed in an orphanage where she received very little medical intervention or care for her development. She’s now almost 5 years old and weighs just 18 pounds. She is delayed in all aspects of her development and spends a majority of her time laying in a crib. Due to problems with her intestines, she often gets bloated after eating and possibly experiences reflux as well.

Reality sucks sometimes.  It is fact that this child was raised by her birth mother for 2 years before coming to the orphanage.  I don't know what that reality was like for her.  But, truth is, reality at the orphanage is that she is not, and never has, received the attention and medical intervention and just plain old every day care that she needs. 5 years old, 18 pounds.  Why is this ok?  When are we going to step up to the plate and say this is NOT okay?  When are we going to step out of our comfort zone and do something?  This child has 2 months for a family to step up.  Otherwise her file gets sent back, and she remains in a crib.  There are so many, just like her.  I am overwhelmed by the sheer greatness of heartache I have for these children.  www.reecesrainbow.org

Game Ball

It was a bittersweet day.  We had our last T-ball game.  We had a great team this year.  Our coaches were fantastical, and the team parents were a lot of fun to hang around with.  We really enjoyed the games.  The kids had a blast!  They are stoked for next year.  Every game a new player got a game ball.  The coaches were so good at picking out something special each child did that particular game as the "reason" they got that particular game ball.  By the end of the season every kid had gotten the coveted "GAME BALL".  Last game of the season, do you know what our coaches did?  They gave every kid on the team a "GAME BALL".  What a great group of guys.  My kids were so excited.

 As tiring as spending a day at the fields could be, we really enjoyed this baseball season.  I became quite good at making picnics for us to partake in, so we were not spending a fortune at the snack bar.  We had a bag of toys and a blanket for the babe to keep her occupied, as well as bug spray,sunscreen, and cases upon cases of gatorade and juice bags.  We won some, we lost some, we tied lots (t-ball and coach pitch don't keep score).  We ate dust, sat through rain, had our fair share of hotdogs, and spit sunflower seeds.  We cheered, we didn't boo, we clapped, we laughed, we bit our nails with suspense, we volunteered, we coached (even when we weren't supposed to).  It was a good time.  I am grateful for our little league.  Not all little leagues are like ours; I know; we've been in them.  But, we finally found a good one.  And I am so grateful.  It is filled with wonderful coaches, great kids, awesome parents, and wholesome ideas, and the snack bar serves a mean burger - hot off the grill.  Thank you Upper Providence Little League, for another year of fond memories.

Schools out...for the summer!

Well well well.  Another year done.  How we consistently make it through year after year of home schooling baffles me at times.  As my older kids get older and push away looking for that independence, schooling becomes harder and harder.  I want, no, I NEED to give them more independence with their schooling.  Yet, those initials...ADHD, ODD...well, they are naysayers.  They make "independence" a very.hard.word.  It reminds me of the Rudolph cartoon I watched as a kid (and I admit still watch, but now only because my kids want to - sure).  Rudolph and Hermie the dentist, off on their adventure, trying to be "independent".  They get themselves into a lot of trouble, and end up back at Santa's, all working harmoniously together.  My house is not harmonious however.  Homeschooling can and does affect the relationships I have with my children.  And it is not always positive.  I struggle every summer with what I should do in the fall...homeschool/not homeschool.  In the end homeschooling always wins, at least it has for the past 8 years.  Next year I will have an 8th grader, a 5th grader, a 1st grader, a kindergardener and a preschooler, and the babe continues with her 7 hours/week of therapy, that's school enough for a 2 year old.  I feel like we are hanging out here on the island of misfit toys, not yet back at Santa's working and singing and being all joyous and elf-like.  I'm the train with square wheels.  But that train eventually found his way to Santa's sack and made it to a little boy's house on Christmas Eve.  And I am determined to give my children what they need.  Whether that be by private, public, or home schooling method is yet to be seen for the coming year.  But gosh darn it we did it again!  We got through another year.  And my kids are smarter than when they started, and they are happy, and I am still alive, albeit greyer.  Independence is important, but family is what matters most.  We are not an A+ homeschool.  My kids will never be in a spelling B.  We will not graduate from high school at the age of 16.  But hopefully, my children will look back on this with fond memories.  As for now the dog days of summer are calling my name, along with a few hundred loads of laundry.

"Behold, children are a gift from the Lord," -Psalm 127:3

Start with one

Look at this face!  How kissable are those cheeks?  I can't stand it.  This is "Stella".  She lives in a country on the other side of the world.  "Stella " just turned 4.  Same age as my trouble#3.  An absolute wonderful age.  Full of life, fun, and learning.  "Stella" will soon be transferred to an institution. There is no one to kiss those cheeks at night. No one to brush that hair, and adorn it with pretty barrettes and bows.  An institution is not a place for anyone, let alone a 4 year old.  I get so overwhelmed by the absolute hugeness of the orphan problem.  I look at all those faces staring back at me and think, "what can I do Lord?  I'm just a suburban stay at home mom.  I'm no one special."  But then in the stillness and absolute quiet of my prayers I hear "1".  "Look at 1".  In Mark 1:29-30 we read about Jesus healing a leper.  It doesn't tell us Jesus healed them all.  Jesus healed ONE.  So, I'm focusing on 1.  This month my family is focusing on "Stella".  A 4 year old little girl who desperately needs someone to love her.  She needs a mommy to hug and kiss her, and a daddy to make her his princess.  We will be saving our excess change and donating it to her adoption fund.  We will be praying for her daily, that she would be healthy and well cared for, and that her family would find her.  That those cheeks, those beautiful, fantastical, loveable, squeezable cheeks would be kissed, more sooner than later.  "In the same way your Father in Heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should perish" -Matthew 18:14

   June is also HIV awareness month.  Check out www.projecthopeful.org.  What an awesome organization.  I can't say enough about the Twietmeyer family.  I want to be like them when I grow up.  Please support this organization.  Learn it and then pay it forward.  Truth is contagious.

Take Me Out To The Ball Fields

This spring has been crazy hectic busy around here.  We have 4 kids on 3 little league teams. Trouble x2 and x3 are on t-ball this year.  What a hoot.  Troublex3 just stands around and smiles.  Always smiling.  He even got the game ball one game for being the happiest player (and trying to switch hit).  Trouble x2 thinks she is ready for the major softball league, and gymnastics, and the swim team, and the equestrian team, and the Russian ballet trop, and college.  She did really enjoy herself, focused so intently on looking like she knew what she was doing. We had AWESOME t-ball coaches!  I am hoping they continue to coach through the years, and at the different levels.  It was a good team, lots of fun. Trouble x1 was in coach pitch.  Not my favorite, but I go and show my support.  Cheering and yelling from the sidelines.  They can be some slow moving games.  They know enough to not be as cute as t-ball but not enough to make it very exciting.  Still, by the end of the year we had kids actually making catches in the infield, throwing kids out and hitting without the tee.  Trouble x1 has no problems slugging the ball.  Very first game he gets up and hits a double.  And being Ethiopian, he is fast (not that all Ethiopians are fast, troublex3 is certainly not, but x1 is wicked fast!).  Catching, well, we needed some help.  At one point the ball hit him and gave him a bloody nose, another game it knocked a tooth loose (baby tooth thankfully.  Tooth Fairy was on high alert for the next 24 hours).  He is determined however.  He goes outside and practices every day.  With only 2 games left he has gotten much better.  Next year he'll move on to machine pitch.   And the excitement will build all over.  Hot dogs from the snack bar, playground friends, games under the lights, entire days spent at the fields, picnics, and dusty clothes.  Hopefully we won't have white pants.  White pants and little league just. don't. mix.

Life lived normal

So we had a friend from church come stay with us for a few days.  "Mr. T. " falls on the autistic scale, has Asperger's, and possible RAD.  After I had said yes to having him stay I started hearing all the horror stories of things he had done at other houses.  I panicked, "What had I agreed to?".  I had anxiety for days.  Having my car rear ended didn't help any.  So, he shows up.  He runs constantly, set off the alarm at our YMCA because he ran through a door that was off limits (he's extremely impulsive), knocked all the cereal boxes off of the shelf at Target, refused to put his seatbelt on until I pulled over, and stopped, and refused to drive anywhere, he sat on Trouble #1's head, blamed EVERYTHING on my kids, put our cat in the dryer (twice), and then proceeded to teach said cat how to jump on the trampoline, he banged his head on the floor for self soothing so hard it literally shook our house.  And this was just the first day.  But you know what?  We had a great time!  The first night he stated he didn't hug, kiss or any of that (but I could say prayers...if I wanted).  By the end he was letting me carry him around, come up behind him and hug him, and kiss him goodnight along with our prayers.  Did he drive us nuts?  Yes, occasionally he did.  Don't all kids on occasion?  Bottom line...he's just a little boy who needs to be loved.  He needs patience, forgiveness, love unconditional.  That's how I am with my Heavenly Father.  Boy, am I obstinate at times!  Yet, Jesus loves me.  He's patient, He forgives me, and He loves me unconditionally.  Even when I run away not listening through the door with the big red sign that says DO NOT ENTER.  I can see the angels now, all having anxiety attacks because I've set off yet another alarm due to my impulsiveness and stubbornness.  Yet God gently guides me back, calms those heavenly hosts whose wings are all aflutter, and points me in the correct direction.   Mr. T., you are welcome back to my house anytime.  You are a joy.

Man Up!

Sometime I just want to shake and throttle some people.  People who just choose to close their eyes to what they don't want to see.  Keeping the unseen unseen.  People who are perfectly wonderful people, but who don't leave their comfort zone for much of anything.  I know some of these people.  Heck, I'm even related to a handful.  WHAT IS YOUR MISSION PEOPLE?!  God sees!  God sees the hurting, the abused, the forsaken of this world. God sees us on our behinds also.  God tells us to be His hands and feet.  Yet, our hands and feet are comfortably sitting and resting.  What are we doing?  Where is the church?  The following is a copied from a blog I follow.  This is a true man of God, who states the obvious point so much more eloquently than I ever could....www.nogreaterjoydad.com

Man Up, Men of God!

What was it in the films “Braveheart” and “Gladiator” that still appeals to men, so much so, that both films are stacked in thousands of men’s DVD collections at home?

I know what they both represented in me…

Courage.

Courage driven by a passion of values. 

In both films the heroes lost their loved ones.  From that moment on, both characters set their faces like flint (à la Isaiah 50:7) and would not stop at anything until mission accomplished.

I think every man wants to identify with heroes like those.  Every man wants to aspire to be just like them.  Gone are the days when Superman was the hero du jour.  Now…it’s PASSION over a cause that men want.  And I think it’s because men have had their passion over the years eroded by changes in our culture.

I had lunch with one of my best friends—a 91-year-old war veteran who flew planes in the South Pacific.  Howard told me that when World War II was in full swing, when Americans were fighting in both the Pacific and in Europe and Africa, the entire nation was driven by the war effort.  Everyone was united and so focused on winning that hardly anyone spoke of anything else.  Nearly every man in the country was chomping at the bit to fight for freedom.  And while they did, their women were active in factories, manufacturing supplies for the cause.

We have lost that, men.  We have been criticized, feminized, and mesmerized by intimidation coming our way.  Since the hippie movement in the 1960’s (something I lived through), fighting for a cause was no longer a noble thing unless it was a fight against the establishment—any establishment, even if it was good.  Superman of the 50’s was taken out in the 60’s by a kryptonite of Krishna-ism.  Good became bad, noble became ignoble, and pure became out of touch.

But now is the time.

Now is the time to recapture what we were placed on this earth for.

Now is the time to join the ranks of martyrs before us and martyrs among us.  Yes, that’s what I said.  We may not die for our Christianity like hundreds of others are EVEN TODAY in other parts of the globe.  But we need to seek and seize the passion that the LORD of Lords has added to the mix when He shaped us men at birth.

Now is the time to identify with the loss of our “loved ones”—not our immediate family members like those in the two films, but the loved ones who’ve preceded us some 2000 years ago.  Loved ones mentioned in Hebrews 11:35-38:

There were others who were tortured, refusing to be released so that they might gain an even better resurrection.  Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment.  They were put to death by stoning; they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated—the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.

Then there are our loved ones whose fate was recorded in history just a few years later; those who were sliced in two by Roman swords, who were impaled on long wooden poles, who were fed to ravenous animals in the Coliseum, who were crucified by the hundreds along the Appian Way (the main road leading into Rome), then lit on fire as human torches, the glow of which was seen for hundreds of miles.

Now is the time for courage in an era where literally millions of orphans (163 million, to be exact) are wasting away in so-called “welfare” institutes and children “care” centers, reminiscent of Hitler’s cowards torturing prisoners in “work camps.” 

The documentary I saw recently, entitled “Bulgaria’s Abandoned Children,” will shake your world--children…CHILDREN…with skin hanging on skeletons like miniature Auschwitz victims.  Children peering outside their institutions at cemeteries awaiting their fate.

Meanwhile, the men of God sleep.

Meanwhile, the men of God brush and blow-dry their hair before going to yet another men’s breakfast.

Meanwhile, the men of God hum and haw about which new car to buy next, while running the three-legged race at a summer men’s camp.

Meanwhile, the men of God close ranks in their family, draw a line in the sand, and tell God, “I will here and no farther!”

Men of God, RISE UP!  RISE UP!  RISE UP!

We have a church down our street that told a family they will not allow them to have a fundraising dinner in their hall so they can adopt a desperate orphan. Why?  Because if they did that, they’d have to allow everyone to do the same.  What?!

Men of God, I am not calling for rebellion.  I am calling for REVOLUTION! 

And the place to start is on your knees.

Get before the Lord and your family and repent of not being a man.  Not being a man of God!

Do you not realize that the true heroes and warriors of world history were men of God?

What has happened to us that we allowed a society to suck the passion of God out of us?

Repent.

Then get off your knees and tell your family that new things now matter.  That this life is not worth saving.  That you will no longer save for a retirement that will not last anyway. 

That you will put up with inconvenience…

and hard work…

and an old age that may not mean all of the kids are out of the house…

and that you will now, once and for all, trust the Lord Jesus Christ, the LION OF JUDAH, with your sustenance, your family’s sustenance, your joy in life, your purpose in life, YOUR LIFE!

Man up and rise up, men of God.

Be on a perpetual reconnaissance mission to seek out ways in which to live kingdom life—to obey our Lord’s commands to care for the orphan and the widow, to visit the sick and the prisoner, to feed the poor.

Think: 163,000 million orphans on the face of the planet is not a world problem.  IT…IS…OUR…PROBLEM!

I beg you, let the Christ in you, the Lion of Judah, wield the sword of Truth and lead your family by your courageous example. 

Shun mediocrity and GO TO WAR!

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.”  Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? YOU ARE A MIST that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

                                                                                                ~ James 4:13-14

Proverbs 31:8, or how about 13:8?

"How wonderful that nobody need to wait a single moment before starting to improve the world."  -Anne Frank

What a pity that we do.  Go here...www.reecesrainbow.org.  Change the life of an orphan.

Hallelujah! What a Saviour!

 I serve a risen Saviour!!



 

Salvation weekend

This is a big holiday weekend around the world.  And I'm not just talking chocolate bunnies.  The Jewish population is celebrating Passover.  Christians are celebrating Good Friday, and Easter (and a few of us celebrate Maundy Thursday :) ).  Passover remembers, celebrates, God bringing the Israelites out of Egypt.  Moses and the gang being freed from slavery, and led to The Promise Land.  "And Moses said to the people, ' Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will work for you today.  For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again.'" -Exodus 14:13  Good Friday and Easter...remembering, celebrating Jesus.  God's son being crucified for our sins.  Arrested, humiliated, beaten, innocent yet found guilty, nailed to a cross, dying.  But, overcoming death.  Beating the darkness of sin and death and being resurrected in 3 days.  God/Jesus bringing me out of darkness.  Freeing me from the slavery of sin and leading me to The Promise Land.  Heaven!  Redemption!  What a huge cost He paid for me.  For you.  I am so grateful.  I once was so lost in selfishness, blind to the Truth.  I'm still selfish.  I am still a sinner.  But now....  Now, I am found.  Adopted by God. Forgiven.  Now I see.  I see truth.  I see everlasting, unconditional love and forgiveness.  I see beauty from ashes.  "For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people." -Titus 2:11  Thank you Abba Father.  Thank you for loving me, forgiving me, creating me, blessing me, growing me, teaching me, disciplining me, leading me, carrying me, freeing me, showing me, washing me, saving me, dying for me.  "And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved." -Acts 4:12  "But as for me, I will look to the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me."  -Micah 7:7

There's a story, of a lovely princess....

I know I am not a good blogger.  There simply is not enough time in my day to get on the computer, think of something snazy to say, and then type it out.  I'm not sure how other people do it.  I'm not very good with words either.  And then there is the fact that my life is simply not that exciting.  Who really wants to sit and read about how I fold my umpteen loads of laundry or what The babe has accomplished in therapy (I can tell you it is NOT speaking).  However, there are times I came across things that I feel I should post.  Things to help others.  Children are my passion.  As is adoption.  Adoption of Special Needs Children is my soap box.  If you catch me standing on it, watch out.  I'll talk your ears off.  Thus it is with this.  These children need our help.  It is one thing to raise a child.  It is another to come up with a ransom, quickly, to bring them home.  When someone is so willing to rescue a child, I feel it is the church's responsibility to help.  God does not ask us to help widows and orphans.  He commands it.  Yes, He is the father to the fatherless.  That does not mean we can stand back and thank Him for taking on that role.  We are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus.  Therefor, WE are to be the father to the fatherless.  Here is one awesome, give ya goosebumps, type of story.  Please check out this blog... http://thestarsaligned.blogspot.com/2012/03/love-multiplied-giveaway.html  Please pray for this child, for this family.  Please donate if you feel led.  There are some cool gifts up for grabs.  Please support and encourage those who say yes to God and rescue those who need rescued.  

Out of the mouths of babes

When putting Trouble x3 to bed, I always ask each one to say something they are thankful for and something that they want to pray for, before we do the "God bless mommy, daddy and all 1,000 friends, cousins, aunts, uncles, etc....  The other night Trouble x1 said he was thankful that he had a mommy and daddy.  That's good for a mommy-heart.  Adoption is good.  Very very good.  " having foreordained us unto adoption as sons through Jesus Christ unto himself, according to the good pleasure of his will", Ephesians 1:5 (ASV) God did not intend for children to live in orphanages without a mommy or daddy to love them.  We are praying for the 168 million who can't be thankful for a mommy and daddy tonight.  "Jesus said, Let the children come to me and do not stop them, because the Kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." -Matthew 19:14 (GNT)

Let us not suffer from depraived indifference

Powerful message.  168 million children.  I don't want to be overwhelmed by that number;  I want to be burdened to do something. 
"I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me."  (Matt 25:40 The Message)

In Faith By Grace

I have a confession to make.  I can be pretty rotten.  I mean, there are days when I just get out of bed and the only thing that will make that day better is for it to be over and I can crawl back in under my covers.  I lack faith some days.  There are days when I can't handle another math problem, or spelling test.  I get impatient.  I get angry when "hospital" is spelled wrong, when we have spent so many days practically living in one.  There are days when I want to pull my hair out, or blow up my house because of the socks on the floor, or cheese stick wrappers haphazardly thrown on the floor instead of in the over-sized trash can, standing right in the middle of the room.  And then there is the laundry.  The never ending baskets of laundry, and mismatched socks.  I'm not sure why we have closets and dressers when my children seem to prefer living out of laundry baskets, and go barefoot.  Then again, at least you can close the closet doors.  I feel alone.  I feel like a failure at housekeeping, home schooling, and mothering.  I say my prayers and wonder if they are penetrating through my ceilings, or just bouncing off and getting lost in the dust on the ceiling fan.  I heard a quote once that hit right where I was convicted.  I'm not sure where I heard it or who said it, but it stuck with me.  "How can I go from being such a die hard Jesus freak in the morning, to somebody who is quite willing to put everything aside and walk away?"  I can be so like that.  I start the day off great with prayer and a good devotion.  I feel like Rocky running up those infamous art museum steps.  And then I start my day. The stress starts, the kids start arguing, disobeying, the laundry piles higher and higher with each princess dress that gets tried on, and therapists want to schedule a makeup session between swim lessons and baseball practice, history class and other therapy sessions.  Math doesn't get done...again. The life size sculptures for the renaissance history home work are in my dining room, sitting next to the large burn on the table from a science experiment gone array.  The Bible tells us all we need is to have faith like a mustard seed.  A mustard seed is pretty small. (See picture above)   Yet, I have a hard time mustering up enough faith to even equal the size of a mustard seed.  It is easier to just "walk away".  I'm a  visual learner, yet I'm instructed to live by faith, not by sight.  I even have a ring that I wear to remind me.  It's silver with "Faith" etched on the outside, and "live by faith not by sight" on the inside. I bought it to remind me that that was what I am supposed to do, so that my visual learner self could see that it's not about sight, if that even makes sense.  My daughter's middle name is Faith because my faith had been stretched during my pregnancy and her first early months.   My signature is "In Faith By Grace"!  I'm all about faith!  Yet, I struggle in this area.  It is by His grace, however, that I can find just enough faith to keep on keepin' on.  Grace means to get something that you do not deserve.  "Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." -Hebrews 4:16  "Find grace to help in time of need".  His grace gets me through the spelling test, His grace gets me through the laundry, His grace gets me through the entire nogoodrotten day and allows me to sleep so that by His grace I can get up tomorrow and try again. It is the only thing that gets me through the day, and I am so grateful that I have it.  Without it I would wither away.  "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." -2Corinthians 8.   I have a lot of weaknesses.  But here is a perfect picture of grace:  after having a complete goodfornothing day, where I deserved a double timeout, not my kids, my daughter surprises me by baking me a cake.  She just wanted to make me feel better.  The middle of the cake ended up not cooking and making a cavern of goo in the middle, but it was the best tasting cake I have ever had.  THAT is grace.  "And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you." -1Peter 5:10  "But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together in Christ - by grace you have been saved - and raised up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.  For by grace you have been saved though faith.  And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not as a result of works, so that no one may boast." -Ephesians 2:4-9  So, I live "In Faith, By Grace".  I am so blessed.

Is this thing on?

Bueller?  Bueller?  Anyone?  Anyone?